This Year’s Bad Burrito Awards - Word&Way

This Year’s Bad Burrito Awards

The Bad Burrito Awards annually recognize actions, products and efforts on behalf of religion that could be the result of late night inspirational ideas caused by that earlier dinner.

Ken SatterfieldKen SatterfieldChristian kitsch. If there’s a war on Christmas, then surely the “We gonna party like it’s my birthday Jesus” t-shirt (with stocking hat) should be a crime and worthy of a burrito (tinyurl.com/2016Burrito-1).

“Inflate him, Play with him & Pray with him!” states the sinister-looking Inflatable Jesus runner-up, promising “hours of bath time fun.” The soggy burrito they’ve won is also all wet (tinyurl.com/2016Burrito-2).

One of the "handy" DIY projects in Ross MacDonald's satirical What Would Jesus Craft?One of the “handy” DIY projects in Ross MacDonald’s satirical What Would Jesus Craft?Of Ross MacDonald’s book, What Would Jesus Craft?, Religious News Service notes the “tongue in cheek” projects like “Jesus’ Pet Dinosaur Nacho Platter.” His inspiration? Some of the terrible crafts made by us or our children (tinyurl.com/2016Burrito-3).

Judging a book. The Englewood Review of Books regularly recognizes Christian books that, regardless of content, have really awful covers. Among those recognized in this past summer is Kung Fu Jesus, edging out Amish novel Goats Gone Wild. Verbal description does neither justice, but a Bad Burrito would (tinyurl.com/2016Burrito-4).

Politics. CBS reported in October that Kentucky Governor Matt Bevin encouraged a group of ministers in a closed-door meeting to violate IRS regulations against endorsing candidates and electioneering because “there is no reason to fear” the law. So, a pastor’s ethics should ignore laws they don’t like if there’s no penalty for breaking them? Sounds like somebody needs a bluegrass-flavored burrito (tinyurl.com/2016Burrito-5).

Surprise outreach. Finally, remember the surprise summer craze, Niantic’s Pokémon Go game? People armed with smartphones used the game’s augmented reality to catch the little Pokémon beasties practically everywhere, including church. That’s right, to capture imaginary animals, people actually visited and attended church! Instead of celebrating the opportunity, Charisma News pointed to the Christian Apologetics and Research Ministry, among others, concerned about possible occult and evolutionary influences.

So to hard-to-please Charisma News and those they named, you are awarded burritos — undercooked and too spicy, of course (tinyurl.com/2016Burrito-6).

Ken Satterfield is Word & Way’s advertising and marketing coordinator. He welcomes your product suggestions. By the way, inclusion in this article does not constitute an endorsement. 

Past Bad Burrito columns:

2019   2018   2017   2016   2015   2014   2013   2012   2011   2010   2009   2008   2007   2006   2005